1994 in the 20tweens

1994 in the 20tweens

Colorfast Grand teint number 5, apple headphones, hair wrapping skills from 1994

Breathe In

It's spring that wraps around my head
Can't embrace it,
Can't escape it.
Feebly wishing i were dead -
The hastening chase,
The chaste that make it
Swirl through new congested blood:
A whirl of sense,
Lightheaded reason
Switched-on twisted lightning rod
Stranded in this sick sense-season.

Murmur, sadly, how love fled. And hid its face amid a crowd of stars. And paced upon the mountains overhead. And left you thirsting on this Earth of ours.

Whose turn is it? I like this game.

Breathe In

Breathe

Breathe Out

Breathe In.

Still of the Night

still of the night

Blue prints of a sort.

From stillness comes desire. From desire comes means. From means comes plans. From plans comes action. From action comes fruit. With fruit comes satisfaction. With satisfaction comes dissatisfaction. With dissatisfaction comes desire. From desire comes means...

Can we ever again achieve stillness? Those who can break the cycle experience peace... little bits of peace followed by desire. Into the still of the night I go and I find rest. From rest comes desire...

still of the night

No one’s ever remembered me that good.  Only the moon even looks at me.

Its how I stay clean (clean but trapped).

running/tripping on vines/the moon pours over me-- splashs slashed by shadow.

Ahead I hear the cacophonous echos of the Revellers.  (They are underwater.  I am outside.)  They are trapped, too, but they don’t know it yet.  I’m not cold or warm, don’t feel much, I’m underblooded.  Other blood blinds in your eyes so you can’t hear it right.  You think its rain except for the way it sticks in your eyelashes, and then you know and wish you didn’t.

And then it all goes backwards, the blood runs back up and your eyes are clear and the moon moves from behind the shadows and your way is light.  Run.

When I creep up, its like they can’t see me, but they know I’m there.  They can smell me.  It is the most danger danger dangerous place for me but also the safest-- I’m hiding right between the eyes where the wolf can’t bite me, can only a little bit see me, foot danglin’.  

They are singing.  Singing and sniffin’ around, noses growing and growing.  I don’t wanna get sucked up in them nostrils. I breathe shallow and lay still.  Their eyes aren’t so good anymore.  All that blood.  The moon is still, too, just watching me.  The moon don’t care if I win or lose.  If someone shouts or startles, I’ll just climb up there, with the moon.  I’ll just sit myself down and rub my eyes clean.

still of the night

curtains - still of the night

i recorded this back in july at like 3 am while rachel was back in virginia.